Thursday, February 21, 2013

This One's For The "Triers"

Over the years I've been blessed to have an amazing support system in place. One that many would give anything to have and hope for everyday. From time to time the occasional doubter has crossed into my support system. Worse yet, this doubter is a two faced liar who earns my trust, only to break my heart and abuse my friendship. Those are the most dangerous people to let in because they'll do the most damage to your life if you let them. To my knowledge, my life is purged of those kinds of people and has been for years. However, if there are any of you hiding within or lurking around the borders of Joshland, I hope you read this and I hope you take it to heart.

This post is dedicated to the "Triers".


You tell me that I'm an inspiration, then you second guess me when I tell you my dreams. You say you support me, then you tell others how you're worried I'm in over my head. You're talking to an adult who handles more on a daily basis than most people could ever imagine, but then you treat me like a child that can't tie their shoes. I need your help and I ask for your support and you only give me condescending pity.

Tell me I can't do something..I dare you. 

I'll make a mental note of everything you don't have the guts to admit to me, but I know you believe in your heart. Then, I'll take that dare and one of two things will happen: 

I will succeed and shove your doubts right back in your face. I won't gloat or boast. I won't trash talk or brag. I'll do it all with my actions and my determination. I might hope for an apology, but I won't expect one because you're too proud and stubborn for that. 

Or maybe I'll give it everything I've got and I'll still fail. I will not reach my goal. I'll fall flat on my face. Maybe everything you expected would happen will happen. Even though you won't make a sound when you see me, the look on your face will tell me all I need to know…"I told you so. I'm sorry it happened this way, but I told you so."

You'd think that might bother me…and you'd be right. I'll be heartbroken because my dream didn't come true…because sometimes that's how life works. So I'll dust myself off, dry my tears and find another dream to chase, but it'll scar me even more that someone I trusted…someone I believed in…doesn't believe in me. 

Still…while I'm thinking about that…I'll also be smiling. See, while you sat on the sidelines warning me about the perils of having my dreams crushed by disappointment, I was out there trying to make my dreams come true. I was out there because I never wanted to wonder "what if?" for the rest of my life. I never wanted to be you and because I tried…I never will be you. 

I don't wear my smile to mock you. I don't have time for that nonsense. I wear my smile because I'm proud of what I did and who I am. That's worth a grin for a moment or two.

"I'd rather try and fail, than fail to try." ~ Anonymous


Peaceful Things,


Monday, February 11, 2013

Joshland Unfiltered Podcast: Episode 4 - Cystic Fibrosis Couples

I didn't forget to post this podcast. I just needed a break before I did. This was one of the hardest and best things I've ever done as a member of the CF Community...and it sometimes hurts to face.

This episode is focused on adults with cystic fibrosis who choose to be in a romantic, long-term relationship. In the case of our to guest panelists, Kev and Rhiannon, that relationship turned into a wonderful marriage...but it was not without it critics. Romantic relationships between people with CF are not encouraged because of the risk of cross infection and cross contamination. In fact, some people in the CF Community speak openly against this choice because - based on scientific studies - it's a potential danger to the health of both adults and - in their opinion -it's a bad example to others in the community. It needed to be talked about and Rhiannon and Kev were up for the challenge.

However, this episode almost didn't make it to air. Here's why:

Rhiannon had some CF related health issues shortly after the taping of this episode that landed her in the hospital. To the shock of many of her family and friends, Rhi's body could not recuperate from these issues and she unexpectedly died. It was heartbreaking to all of us, but no one felt more pain than her husband, Kev.

After Rhi died, Tim and I told Kev that he wasn't obligated to share this podcast with anyone and that we'd happily edit it together as a gift for him and those he chose to share it with. Kev insisted that we share this podcast with everyone because this story was too important to go untold. That somewhere out there are people who misunderstand what it means to be a CF couple and that it is VERY important it is to weigh the options before making such a life changing decision...but to never let cystic fibrosis stop you from being happy. More importantly, he wanted to give people the opportunity to hear Rhi's voice just one more time.  

Kev and Rhiannon are two of the many reasons why I'm so proud of this podcast and why thankful to my friend and producer Tim Grossklaus as well as the CF Community for giving of their time and energy to something worthwhile. Every story needs to be told...even the ones we might not want to hear or agree with. I could rave on and about this podcast, but it wouldn't do it justice.Please take your time to listen to the story and share the lives of two people who happened to have CF...and fell in love.

Thank you to Kev and Rhiannon for this gift and their bravery. Thank you, Rhiannon, for just "being". The world was brighter while you were here.

JUP on iTunes:

Podcast Player on the JUP Fanpage:

Peaceful Things, Stay Positive and Love Always,

Josh and Tim

What'd You Think?

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Peaceful Things ~ Josh
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