Monday, November 1, 2010

My Perfect Day WITH CF

It's a crisp fall Sunday...

I wake up and my chest isn't hurting. There isn't 15 minutes worth of green and brown mucus expectoration from the moment I open my eyes. Instead it's maybe one or two minutes of clear and clean stuff. It's thankfully one of those mornings I feel rested because I went the whole night without waking up to cough out the junk that blocks my upper and lower lobes or hunched over in pain because my stomach feel nauseous from swallowing all the crap that drips down my throat.

After a productive lung treatment, I'm focused on the tasks at hand and am able to start them earlier in the day. Yard work is refreshing. I look up to the sky and smile while the wind chaps my lips and makes my leaf blower obsolete. I think the wind is Angie having some fun with me. Anything to make me look foolish. If the sight of me chasing leaves around with leaf blower on a blustery day isn't foolish, I don't know what is.

After my yard work is done , I head to the backyard where my puppies make me smile as they chase those stupid squirrels from the yard and they roll in who knows what just to get the "clean bath stink" off of their fur. We run around the yard and drive the neighbors crazy with our barking (yes, I bark while I play with my "kids".)

"The Boys" and I come inside where my wife gives us all big hugs and softly cup my ears with her hands to warm them up. A quick smooch and a pat on the backside sends me downstairs to the man-cave where I watch the Vikings whup the Packers into oblivion. At halftime my closest buddies show up and we analyze the first half while we play some video games and I fit in another treatment.

After the game, all the important people in my life stop by or call us just to say hello and tell us that they love us.

In the evening, I dance in the kitchen to some oldies music with my wife while we wait for the pot of spaghetti sauce and meatballs to simmer. Then we watch a funny movie snuggled on the couch. After one more treatment it's an early bedtime because I wouldn't feel stressed about the scary parts of my life that surround me every day..

You see, my perfect day is simple. It has nothing to do with material or financial b.s. You can't take that garbage with you. It has to do with love. That perfect day is something I can experience any day of the week because it's always right at my fingertips. It's the little things that make life perfect.

For example:

Yesterday I held my little goddaughter in my arms. She was a giraffe for Halloween. It made me smile when I called her name and she waddled over to me with open arms. I picked her up as my chest was aching from coughing for 3 weeks straight and nuzzled her neck until she made that heart-warming giggle I love so much. I've saved that one in the memory bank forever. I have moments like that every day because I look for them. Do you?

My perfect day with CF is everyday I can wake up and see how lucky I am to be loved, whether I'm in a hospital bed or just living my normal life. When I die, I promise you I will die happy because I will know that I did the best I could with every day. I wasn't perfect. I made mistakes, but I've done my best to make up for them by being good to others and appreciating everything I can.

The past few months have been hard for me, but I am making it through my tough stuff thanks to the little moments, my family and my friends. At the end of the day, if I don't have those three things...I have nothing.

Much Love and Peaceful Things,

Josh

7 comments:

  1. Thank you for making me yet another perfect day.

    Love,Mom xoxox

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  2. this is a great post Josh. I hope we can meet in person some day. my kiddos love you (Moganko). you give me hope when I'm having a rough day. god bless!

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  3. As a fellow lover of the little things...I like your perfect days Josh. Without winning the lottery, we are still lucky people surrounded by people that love us with or without CF. Thanks for another positive post. :-)

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  4. Yeah! I am so glad you are back to blogging. Your dogs are so freaking cute! I also have little dogs, Cricket and Stella.
    It is not fair that people have to live with CF, but you have such a great attitude about the whole thing. Stay well this winter.

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  5. Sounds like a great day. Expect for the fact your Vikings are sucking big time. You should email the team and tell them they're ruining your perfect Sundays.

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  6. This is beautiful Josh. I really appreciate this post and your use of language... I am a late life diagnosis. 9/1/2009. A positive sweat chloride and a lifetime of lung and belly problems... at any rate, initially I was so stuck in the "before"... I was an elite runner and triathlete that got sidelined from chronic lung infections and in the last 4 months I have come to see the beautiful parts of my life that I was unable to when I was racing my running times and training more than I saw friends or family. I can say that I am happy... truly happy in my life. This year has been hard, 4 surgeries and 8 months of IV's... but I am coming out the other end... in part because of amazing folks like yourself and the handful of others I follow...the gratitude is contagious and I am so truly grateful for that.
    Stay well
    Tara

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