Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Thank You, Conner



This illustration is a special gift from my wife and I to the Jones Family. I am happy to share it with you here on Joshland. :-)

I know I can't stop you
from taking or using this drawing, but I certainly hope you will let it rest here as a constant reminder of my special bond with Conner.

~ Love, Josh



I wanted to wait until enough time had passed so I could truly reflect on and eloquently express my thoughts about my little friend Conner Jones, the loving and vibrant little boy who passed away on June 24th, 2010 from complications of Cystic Fibrosis and Prune Belly Syndrome at 7 years old.

Then I realized that there will NEVER be enough time.

This was one of my first blog posts that I wrote. It was shortly after a high school friend of mine passed away from cancer. I think it's appropriate to share today:

Hello long lost stranger,

I’ll never get used to seeing you. I can’t predict when you will appear, much less who you will take back with you. Is there something that will redirect your focus? Even though you make me wiser and appreciate all that I have, I wish you would stop hurting me, those I know, and those I don't. Please stop coming so early on in life and bringing the pain in tow with you. Come later, for instance, when we have been here for seven or eight decades and most of our lives are fulfilled. Come after we have said our goodbyes, made peace with those we’ve wronged and those who we feel have wronged us, seen what we’ve wanted to, and skipped what we didn’t. Come after we have loved and been loved. At least come after we have attempted to fulfill our dreams. I know that is not how the game works, but it doesn’t stop me from wishing I could change the rules.

Peace be with those who have passed away. May I have the honor of seeing you again someday. Until then, my memories of you – be they many or few – will ease the pain. I wish you happiness wherever we go from here.

Little Conner....my special little buddy. We shared a brotherly connection even though we never spoke a word to one another. Through a puppet...a foam-rubber inanimate object...we formed a special bond. Your soul was so full of joy and love. You are in a beautiful place full of fire engines, Grover the Muppet, and Double Stuffed Oreos (only the filling :-). Giggles and smiles are mixed with tears, but have no fear. Our memories of you are the eternal flame of your life because superheroes are immortal. I will never forget the brief moments of your life that you shared with me. You are a better man than I will ever be if I live to be 100.

CONNER DID NOT LOSE HIS FIGHT. That would imply that the rules were fair and just. He won because he never quit in a battle few thought he would survive from the get-go. Everyone who lives each day against all odds will NEVER lose their fight against the evil.

Peace and love to Conner and The Jones Family. Just like my sister, Angie...LOVE is how he earned his wings.

Love,

Josh

Joshland Notes:

There is a big push for anyone touched by Conner's Story to write to the Today Show. While I am not in a place where I can emotionally do this right now, I fully encourage anyone who wishes to. If the Today Show responds, hopefully they will give the Jones Family proper time to mourn their son.

You can read Conner and his entire family's story through his mother Sarah's words at:

http://notsobrightandshiny.blogspot.com/

It is heart-wrenching and beautiful at the same time. It is an emotional rollercoaster that I honestly have a VERY HARD TIME READING. It has a lot of similarities to Angie's life. And yet...I read.

Here is an article from a Seattle paper that chronicles Conner's life and shares some emotional moments from his funeral. Very well done and touching. A sea of RED: Conner's favorite color. :-)

The Daily News Online - Hundreds celebrate life of Longview boy who inspired many

Even celebrities wore RED FOR CONNER:

Chelsea Handler wrote this on her Twitter Account:

http://www.twitlonger.com/show/2799p4

And Regis and Kelly wore RED FOR CONNER on their show. You have no idea how hard this was for me to write on here because I find Regis EXTREMELY ANNOYING! That's a story for another time. :-)

Thank you to everyone who wore their RED. :-)

9 comments:

  1. Excellent writing as usual....you're right, it's an emotional blog for sure.

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  2. Thank you for this post and your words: CONNOR DID NOT LOSE HIS FIGHT.

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  3. Josh, thank you. I am moved deeply by your blog and Connor's mom's account of his last hours on this side of heaven. Life is precious. All are in my heart and prayers.
    Love, Uncle Brian

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  4. Wow, what a sad story. Their family will be in my prayers. Your words are so beautiful Josh, very well written.

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  5. Carly and Josh,
    The drawing said it all, before I could blink one time. The words always touch the right places in my heart. The two of you not only share a beautiful love with each other-you share that love to others hand in hand. What a special couple you are. God bless Connor and family.
    Love,
    Mom xoxox

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  6. Josh-
    I am a new mom to the CF world and the blogging world but find your "purpose" in life very admireable. I have viewed some of your you tube video, etc. It's great to see and follow your blog now. Thanks so being such a advocate for awareness...

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  7. You and your wife have big hearts. Very nice post and words.

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